Autopilot

It’s been a few years since I added a blog entry. I suppose I went through a period of time when I felt I had nothing to say. This along with my tendency to procrastinate has delayed my posts. One of my new year’s intentions, however, is to become more aware of when I procrastinate and why I do.  An ongoing work in progress! So here is the first of many blogs of 2024.

What exactly is Autopilot?

Have you ever driven home from work or school, pulled into your garage and didn’t know how you got there? You don’t remember the drive at all. That’s autopilot: making unconscious, automatic decisions without any thought about what you are doing. Your brain can save energy with automatic decision making, which can be helpful as it frees up conscious thought for more mentally taxing things. The problem is we go through life sleepwalking and not being present in mundane tasks but also life’s important events. We spend too much time thinking about where we need to be, what we’d rather be doing or what we are making for dinner, etc. and not about what we are actually doing.  This even affects conversations with people and impedes our ability to listen to others in a conscious way.

Obviously, there are times when we do need autopilot, but do you want to live like that as a permanent state of being? I want to be present in whatever it is I am doing and whoever I am with. I’ve come up with a few things that work for me to get me out of autopilot. Hopefully, they can help you too.

The first and most important thing, as always, is to become aware of when you are on autopilot. That’s not easy to do because you are doing something without conscious thought so how are you supposed to then think about it!

Here are some tools to consciously think about:

1.       Pay attention to your surroundings. The tree in your front/back yard; have you ever really looked at it, touched it or examined its leaves? You can also do this when you are walking, for example. Put the phone down and turn the music off. Listen to the birds singing and the wind through the trees.  If you are driving, take another way home. Don’t just take the fastest route.  Notice the sidewalks in the neighborhood you are going through. Are there trees? What do the homes look like? Notice the people walking their dogs. How do you feel when you are in that part of town?

2.       Breathe:  We breathe shallowly while in autopilot mode. Set a reminder on your phone to take in some deeper breaths every hour. Feel the cool air going through your nostrils and the warm air leaving them. Breathe deep into your stomach for at least 10 conscious breaths.  You could also take slower and deeper breaths into your heart area. Just imagine your breath flowing in and out of your heart. This will also help you to connect with your authentic Self. When I do this exercise, I often say, “Hi, there you are” after a few breaths.

3.       Be grateful:  We take so much for granted. It’s easy to be frustrated with work, people and various situations but if we can remember what we do have and be grateful for those things it helps to shift our focus from the negative and into something more positive. Be grateful for that roof over your head and the job you have that allows you to afford that roof. Every time I take a shower, I say ‘thank you’ for that warm water coming out. When my heater goes on in the winter, I thank it for keeping me warm. Also, be grateful for the people in your life that make a difference for you. We really have much to be grateful for.

4.       Presence: Be in the moment with whatever you are doing. Even if it is washing the dishes. Pay attention to the water coming over your hands. Feel your hand on the sponge that is scrubbing the pan. Be where you are. When you are sitting in your chair at work/home, feel how comfortable you feel in the seat. Feel the weight of your butt on the seat and where the back of the seat meets your back. If you are talking to someone, be present with them. Listen to them without thinking about what you want to say next. Be there wholly with them. It doesn’t matter if it’s a friend or a stranger. Practice being present in whatever you are doing.

5.       Play: When you are playing a sport or just throwing the frisbee around with a friend it gets you into the moment. You can’t really think about anything else when a ball is coming straight for your head! It also makes us feel good because we are moving the body, which has a plethora of benefits. So get out and play!